Greetings all!
Lots of cool stories to share! One of the most exciting happened the other day, but first I’ll back up and share some other things. I left Friday the 13th to drive to the YFC conference center in Magaliesberg, South Africa with three other YFC Botswana staff for a weekend youth leader conference. It was a great, rejuvenating trip and I hope to share more in a future post about how it was meaningful to me spiritually.
The day after the conference in South Africa, Monday the 16th, we started a Youth Week camp at a church an hour away from Mochudi. It was every night last week, ending with a youth service Sunday morning. We, the YFC staff/volunteers, each took turns leading the program for a night (choosing songs, memory verse, games, bible quiz, and giving the talk). My night was Thursday, though all week I helped lead worship along with E.J., the national director. It was the first time I’ve gotten to use my guitar plugged into a sound system, so that was cool. My talk was on the Holy Spirit and sanctification (growing more and more like Christ). For part of it, I shared about how the Holy Spirit had led me to be a “messenger of mercy” and extend mercy in court to the man who caused our accident. The outreach camp went really well, and we can tell that the youth were impacted and learned a lot.
Last week I also organized a planning meeting for the abstinence club we have the go-ahead to start at the Senior Secondary School in Mochudi. Tomorrow we will meet again to continue planning the curriculum. The teacher from the school who I met with a couple weeks back is coming to these meetings, as well as two local young men who are graduates from that school and were both volunteers with Face the Nation, the AIDS prevention programme started by the church I attend in Gaborone that just finished working in that school (and every senior secondary school in the country). So it’s great to have all their input and insight in creating the curriculum to help encourage abstinence and support the 300+ students who made commitments to sexually abstain from now until their marriage and be faithful to their spouse in marriage.
Yesterday, Twila [a new YFC volunteer/housemate from Canada] and I went to a government meeting for all the NGOs [non-governmental organizations] in this district who are working to fight AIDS. We learned the latest statistics on the situation in our district and how we can work together collaboratively to address the needs here. One presenter said, “We can expect and desire that Youth for Christ will be working to promote abstinence…and not just telling youth to abstain, but helping them develop life-skills to be able to abstain.” Amen, sister. We’re on it!
And finally, it’s time for the best story! On Saturday, I felt I should go and pray on top of the lookout point in Mochudi, near the chief’s house and office [yes, there is tribal leadership here – a hereditary chief and his headman]. Anyway, I have been trying to go up to the lookout point once a week to pray for the people of Mochudi, especially the youth. However, this time, I felt like I should take my guitar and just worship God on the “mountain” [it’s like a craggy hill/cliff thing, but “mountain” is easier]. I’d never done that, and I thought, “Really, Lord? You want me to sing/worship up there?”, not knowing who might be around during this busy weekend of a traditional cultural ritual going on by the chief’s office [the women were being officially initiated into the tribe after weeks of initiation school where they do lots of traditional rituals. This hasn’t been done for decades here in Mochudi, but the new chief is reviving it again]. But I felt like I was supposed to go with my guitar anyway, so I grabbed it, drove there, and parked by the chief’s office. There was no one really around (I found out later that the big initiation ceremony had already happened earlier that day). I hiked up the “mountain” and just stood there overlooking Mochudi, singing songs to the King of kings and Lord of lords.
I played and sang for awhile, slightly amused by the donkeys rolling around on the path down below (scratching their backs?!). After I got done singing “How Great is Our God,” I was surprised to hear clapping coming from the rocks to my left. I bent down to see two boys sitting in the cleft of a massive rock, who had evidently been there listening for awhile. I smiled and said hi, but felt I should just keep worshipping, so I continued. A couple songs later, the boys crawled up behind me on the rocks and sat to listen. I introduced myself and learned their names—Moses and Laone, brothers. I asked if they wanted me to keep singing? Yes! So I sang another worship song or two and felt led to just start talking to them.
“I’ve been singing songs to Modimo [God] and Jesu [Jesus]. Do you know Modimo…or Jesus?” They said not really, or not well. I asked, “Would you like to know Modimo more…to know more about Jesu?” They both replied, “Yes.” I was kind of stunned for a second with this opportunity that just fell into my lap, but I was like, “Ok then..well…Modimo created the whole world, including you and me…”
And I went on for several minutes explaining the message of the gospel. I had some paper so I could draw out things to help them understand and read verses to them from my bible. We talked about what it means to repent, to truly trust in Christ, to let Him be Lord of your life, etc. I explained how just going to church and doing good things can’t restore a close relationship with God…only trusting in Christ and accepting His work on the cross can bring us close to God.
I felt I should ask them where they feel they are spiritually in regard to Christ. Moses, the older brother, said that he feels like he’s kinda in the middle—he hasn’t ever really trusted in Christ, though he goes to church. I told him if he ever wants to, to become a Christian, he can sincerely pray to God and trust Him and accept His forgiveness. I sort of demonstrated a prayer he could pray to God to start the journey of following Him. I made sure to emphasize that praying a prayer like that is not the end, but just the beginning of a life lived with God where he can follow His plans and will for him.
I felt I should ask him if he wants to trust Christ? He replied, “Yes I want to trust Christ.” I continued, “And let Him be Lord of your life, like the kgosi [chief], where you do what He says…read the bible and follow what it says?” “Yes.” I could sense his sincerity.
Again, I was kind of at a loss for words for a second and felt like I should ask if what I had said in that demonstrated prayer was what he felt he wanted to pray to God? Did it express what he felt in his heart? “Yes.” Ok…! so I asked, “Do you want me to just pray that again and you can repeat it after me?” Both brothers enthusiastically nodded and said yes. Ok…! So I led them in a prayer on top of the “mountain”!
I learned they were 12 and 15 years old and go to a solid biblical church here in Mochudi. I explained where our YFC office is (right near their church!) so they can stop by and we’ll connect them with our follow-up discipleship bible study program. I encouraged them to talk to God (pray), keep going to church, to read the bible (which they have at home), and to stop by YFC on Saturday nights for our coffee bar program as well. What an amazing experience! As someone told me last night, it was like another divine appointment. God is so cool.
To be honest, that’s not normally my “style” in terms of evangelism. True I’ve had several spiritual conversations with strangers in random places over the years…on airplanes [the first spiritual conversation I had with a stranger was a 3-hour one with a Pakistani Muslim on a plane, and he was the one who kept asking more questions about Jesus!], hiking volcanoes/mountains, in taxis/buses, on Mayan ruins, in a Botswana government meeting, etc, but I normally don’t feel led to lead people in a prayer to give their lives to God right then and there because I want to be sure they are sincere and not feeling pressured or coerced in any way to say yes to pray. Making a commitment to trust Christ and follow Him is not a light, casual thing. So honestly, I have hardly ever prayed with someone on the spot like that.
But with these brothers, it just felt like the Lord had been preparing them and they were sincerely ready…like fruit that was about to fall off the tree and I just happened to be in the right place at the right time to catch it. Even from the first time I saw them in the cleft of the rock just listening to the worship songs, I felt like I needed to just keep singing because the Holy Spirit was working in them through the music…and I would eventually talk with them. And that’s how it turned out. Beautiful. How great is our God!
Well, this week and next are much more relaxed…no official ministry because the schools are on break. So I’m looking forward to some longer runs (last run I saw 6 donkeys, 2 ducks, about 45 cows, and the same 4-foot lizard by the river!) and some more time to relax, process, and reflect.
Thanks for reading. Hope you are well.
Blessings,
Em
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Thursday, August 12, 2010
God's at work! Birth of a Prayer Movement!
Hello all!
Lots of good stuff to report! I will go back and finish up what I was sharing last time about how God was encouraging me in the midst of lots of challenges and trials.
The day that I found out my clothes were stolen after my car effectively died the night before (Sunday July 25--the day I almost broke into tears in the grocery store), I wrote this in my journal:
I was thinking how so much has been stripped away…Dad, Ken, my car (and therefore convenience, independence), my clothes, my health, etc…so that I really only can hope, trust, depend and find comfort in God…It’s almost as if I’m finding out if God is enough to satisfy me…Things I usually ‘count on’ are no longer guaranteed…the only stable secure thing is God and His love.
Then later that day, after I was in tears, I read my daily devotional and that day’s entry was entitled: “God is Enough” and all about how in the midst of trials we can trust Him to be sufficient!
The next day, as I shared briefly last post, I was able to secure the ability to lead an abstinence club at the local high school in Mochudi. I found out later that YFC has never had a club at that school! My second day back from the States in mid-July, I went over to the school to meet with the Face the Nation [AIDS prevention programme] volunteers for whom I’d been a prayer partner during the 5-week abstinence curriculum they taught at the school. They texted me just 20 minutes before they would be leaving the school on their last day there. So I hopped in my car to be able to see them again before they left and hopefully meet the guidance/counseling staff with whom I would need to talk to get permission to start the abstinence club. In that short time, I did get to meet and exchange contact info with the key staff person, who even prayed with us as we held hands in a circle in her office.
I also contacted another teacher that Face the Nation had connected me with, who wants to help in running an abstinence club. The teacher told me the sobering fact that just in this last term (3 months long) there have been 9 pregnancies at that school, so this club is sorely needed. This teacher is the one I mentioned who has a Masters in HIV/AIDS management and who is translating our materials into Braille for the blind students. I went to the school last week to meet with her, and we are going to meet again next week to adapt/create the curriculum to better fit the students there. She has been asking students what they think will be most effective for a club. Meanwhile, I’ve been researching on the internet and in other approaches to see what we can do for curriculum.
The next day after calling the guidance/counseling teacher to secure the ability to do the abstinence club, Tuesday July 27, I was invited to share with the Canadian short-term team the testimony of how I was called to Botswana and about the accident/recovery and speaking in court. So I was grateful for the opportunity to give a powerpoint presentation to share about God’s “amazing-ness” and redemptive Hand.
That night, I felt led to write a letter to one particular Canadian team member, as the team would be leaving the next day. It turns out she also felt led to write me a letter that night, so the next day we exchanged them at the same time. I read her letter to me later that afternoon after we’d dropped them at the airport. I was blown away by what I read – it was like a mirror image of what I had written to her! Here is part of what I wrote to her:
“It’s a long race this life…it’s not a sprint. You have to have a marathon mentality. Do marathon runners just wake up one day and run a marathon without training? No…they would not be able to finish for lack of conditioning. Likewise, the Lord is preparing you to run with perseverance the race He’s set before you” [Hebrews 12:2].
Her letter, written the same night, included that same verse about running with perseverance the race He’s set before us, and she also included this:
“You are making a difference here! You are! But you are taking down a huge giant here—AIDS—and that’s not going to happen overnight, it will be a marathon. But if you train with God and walk by faith, you will be unstoppable (Hebrews 11).”
Crazy cool, eh? I emailed her when she got back to ask if she remembered what she wrote in hers, and she responded:
“Oh and about your letter...ya i totally remember what i wrote...it was like the same as yours! i was freakin out on the plane when i was reading it. Jehovah Sneaky :P”
I had told her about “Jehovah Sneaky” and now I shall acquaint you as well. You see, there are different names given to God in the Old Testament, like Jehovah Rapha (The God who Heals), Jehovah Jireh (The God who Provides), Jehovah Nissi (The Lord is my Banner), etc…and “Jehovah Sneaky” is another name I like to call God when He does crazy cool, loving things you weren’t expecting :), i.e. the same day we read the letters, “Jehovah Sneaky” had also been at work prompting one of the Canadians to anonymously pay for my new car battery.
A couple nights later, I didn’t so much sleep…for a beautiful reason—the first All-Night Interdenominational Prayer Meeting here at the YFC office! At points there were upwards of 70 people praising and praying to God; 25 people stayed the whole time from 10pm - 6 am!! It was the kick-start of an interdenominational prayer movement that will meet here at YFC regularly. It is definitely a "God-thing"... one of the other YFC staff, Maruping, who just came on staff before I had to go back to the US for Dad’s funeral, organized it while I was in the States without my knowledge and without knowing that I had been journaling and praying about starting the same thing! Also, he felt we should continue the prayer movement on Sunday nights at the office...the same night and place I had journaled about! Meanwhile, the YFC director's wife said she felt the time is now for an interdenominational, intergenerational prayer movement here to unify the churches.
So we are excited about what the Lord is doing here! I helped lead worship for part of the All-Night of Prayer, but honestly I was not needed—local Batswana led worship for most of it and sang their hearts out to God. We spent several hours praising and worshipping God, heard preaching from a pastor followed by prayer for people, and then we all united in intercession. We prayed for the youth here, the political leaders, the church leaders that they would be kingdom-minded, for unity among the churches, for each other and our families, etc. Maruping even led a time of prayer for the Jewish people and the peace of Jerusalem. It was a beautiful and exciting time.
I had actually first found out about it on the preceding Sunday (the rough day that my clothes were stolen and I was sick) when I had attended a local church here in Mochudi with the Canadian short-term team. The church made an announcement in the service about an All-Night of Prayer to be held the upcoming Friday at Youth for Christ offices! It was to pave the way for creating a sustained prayer movement in this area.
The first of those Sunday night prayer meetings was last week (August 8), and we feel this is a prayer movement that should only stop when Jesus returns. We are praying for these meetings to gain momentum and bring unity to the Body of Christ here. One exciting thing to share about the first meeting was that two teenage girls had been walking by and felt drawn to come in…we found out afterwards that they weren’t yet followers of Christ, but they were seeking to know more and learn how they could follow Him! So while Maruping was talking to them afterwards and praying with them, another attendee asked what ministry things I’m doing lately so I told him about starting the abstinence club at the local high school. Turns out, he used to be a Face the Nation volunteer and worked in that school (as well as attended it himself in his teens). He is willing to help with the abstinence club and counseling of teens there!
That same guy stopped by yesterday to tell me that he talked with a teacher at another school where I help lead Scripture Union club, and shared that perhaps YFC can hold a training so the various club leaders at surrounding schools can all come and be equipped on how to lead their own peer-counseling and abstinence clubs. Wow…so that’s cool. Way to think strategically to reach the most youth – train and equip the student leaders from several schools! I honestly don’t know what exactly at this point we would share with them, but he also mentioned that there’s a research agency in town who would be willing to partner with us and possibly provide material and statistics!
The doors of opportunity keep flying open! I need discernment now to be sure I’m choosing the right things to get involved in so I don’t bite off more than I can chew. But that’s a great problem to have…and we just need to pray for God to raise up more volunteers and staff. The fields are ripe for the harvest, but the labourers are few. It is encouraging though to see this guy rising up with such eagerness and willingness to help. He also was one of the lead singers during the whole night of prayer.
Someone sent me a message the other day saying that she was going to pray “that God will send someone alongside you to help you with your work.” I read that yesterday, the day this guy brought up the idea of having trainings for club leaders and expressed his willingness to do whatever he can to help. Then today, Maruping told me that a guy walking past the office told him he wants to get involved—and he too used to be a Face the Nation volunteer! He’s going to stop by and talk to me soon! Amen!!
Tomorrow I am driving 5 hours to a YFC retreat center in Magaliesberg, South Africa with 3 YFC Botswana staff for a youth leader conference this weekend. We will return on Sunday. This will be my first long road trip in Africa, first time driving through a border post, and first time driving in South Africa. Interestingly enough, though, it will be my third time at this retreat center. It was where my mission trip to Botswana in 2004 started and ended! So I’m looking forward to being back there and reminiscing on the many things God taught me there and the journey that He has led me on since. Prayers for safe travels are most appreciated, and also for the Youth Week camp starting Monday for teenagers in a city adjoining the capital. I will give the message on Thursday night about the Holy Spirit and becoming more and more Christlike. Sweetness.
Ok I’m gonna go for a run. I saw a 4 foot lizard recently on a run down by the river! Creepy. Literally ;). Just now I heard rustling outside...a huge herd of goats was in the YFC office yard climbing up and eating leaves off our trees! Like a few days ago, I had to chase the goats out of the yard. Last time the goats were accompanied by 6 chickens too. That was a fun task 'herding' them out of the yard! You're welcome, people of Mochudi, for that spectacle!
Blessings,
Em
Lots of good stuff to report! I will go back and finish up what I was sharing last time about how God was encouraging me in the midst of lots of challenges and trials.
The day that I found out my clothes were stolen after my car effectively died the night before (Sunday July 25--the day I almost broke into tears in the grocery store), I wrote this in my journal:
I was thinking how so much has been stripped away…Dad, Ken, my car (and therefore convenience, independence), my clothes, my health, etc…so that I really only can hope, trust, depend and find comfort in God…It’s almost as if I’m finding out if God is enough to satisfy me…Things I usually ‘count on’ are no longer guaranteed…the only stable secure thing is God and His love.
Then later that day, after I was in tears, I read my daily devotional and that day’s entry was entitled: “God is Enough” and all about how in the midst of trials we can trust Him to be sufficient!
The next day, as I shared briefly last post, I was able to secure the ability to lead an abstinence club at the local high school in Mochudi. I found out later that YFC has never had a club at that school! My second day back from the States in mid-July, I went over to the school to meet with the Face the Nation [AIDS prevention programme] volunteers for whom I’d been a prayer partner during the 5-week abstinence curriculum they taught at the school. They texted me just 20 minutes before they would be leaving the school on their last day there. So I hopped in my car to be able to see them again before they left and hopefully meet the guidance/counseling staff with whom I would need to talk to get permission to start the abstinence club. In that short time, I did get to meet and exchange contact info with the key staff person, who even prayed with us as we held hands in a circle in her office.
I also contacted another teacher that Face the Nation had connected me with, who wants to help in running an abstinence club. The teacher told me the sobering fact that just in this last term (3 months long) there have been 9 pregnancies at that school, so this club is sorely needed. This teacher is the one I mentioned who has a Masters in HIV/AIDS management and who is translating our materials into Braille for the blind students. I went to the school last week to meet with her, and we are going to meet again next week to adapt/create the curriculum to better fit the students there. She has been asking students what they think will be most effective for a club. Meanwhile, I’ve been researching on the internet and in other approaches to see what we can do for curriculum.
The next day after calling the guidance/counseling teacher to secure the ability to do the abstinence club, Tuesday July 27, I was invited to share with the Canadian short-term team the testimony of how I was called to Botswana and about the accident/recovery and speaking in court. So I was grateful for the opportunity to give a powerpoint presentation to share about God’s “amazing-ness” and redemptive Hand.
That night, I felt led to write a letter to one particular Canadian team member, as the team would be leaving the next day. It turns out she also felt led to write me a letter that night, so the next day we exchanged them at the same time. I read her letter to me later that afternoon after we’d dropped them at the airport. I was blown away by what I read – it was like a mirror image of what I had written to her! Here is part of what I wrote to her:
“It’s a long race this life…it’s not a sprint. You have to have a marathon mentality. Do marathon runners just wake up one day and run a marathon without training? No…they would not be able to finish for lack of conditioning. Likewise, the Lord is preparing you to run with perseverance the race He’s set before you” [Hebrews 12:2].
Her letter, written the same night, included that same verse about running with perseverance the race He’s set before us, and she also included this:
“You are making a difference here! You are! But you are taking down a huge giant here—AIDS—and that’s not going to happen overnight, it will be a marathon. But if you train with God and walk by faith, you will be unstoppable (Hebrews 11).”
Crazy cool, eh? I emailed her when she got back to ask if she remembered what she wrote in hers, and she responded:
“Oh and about your letter...ya i totally remember what i wrote...it was like the same as yours! i was freakin out on the plane when i was reading it. Jehovah Sneaky :P”
I had told her about “Jehovah Sneaky” and now I shall acquaint you as well. You see, there are different names given to God in the Old Testament, like Jehovah Rapha (The God who Heals), Jehovah Jireh (The God who Provides), Jehovah Nissi (The Lord is my Banner), etc…and “Jehovah Sneaky” is another name I like to call God when He does crazy cool, loving things you weren’t expecting :), i.e. the same day we read the letters, “Jehovah Sneaky” had also been at work prompting one of the Canadians to anonymously pay for my new car battery.
A couple nights later, I didn’t so much sleep…for a beautiful reason—the first All-Night Interdenominational Prayer Meeting here at the YFC office! At points there were upwards of 70 people praising and praying to God; 25 people stayed the whole time from 10pm - 6 am!! It was the kick-start of an interdenominational prayer movement that will meet here at YFC regularly. It is definitely a "God-thing"... one of the other YFC staff, Maruping, who just came on staff before I had to go back to the US for Dad’s funeral, organized it while I was in the States without my knowledge and without knowing that I had been journaling and praying about starting the same thing! Also, he felt we should continue the prayer movement on Sunday nights at the office...the same night and place I had journaled about! Meanwhile, the YFC director's wife said she felt the time is now for an interdenominational, intergenerational prayer movement here to unify the churches.
So we are excited about what the Lord is doing here! I helped lead worship for part of the All-Night of Prayer, but honestly I was not needed—local Batswana led worship for most of it and sang their hearts out to God. We spent several hours praising and worshipping God, heard preaching from a pastor followed by prayer for people, and then we all united in intercession. We prayed for the youth here, the political leaders, the church leaders that they would be kingdom-minded, for unity among the churches, for each other and our families, etc. Maruping even led a time of prayer for the Jewish people and the peace of Jerusalem. It was a beautiful and exciting time.
I had actually first found out about it on the preceding Sunday (the rough day that my clothes were stolen and I was sick) when I had attended a local church here in Mochudi with the Canadian short-term team. The church made an announcement in the service about an All-Night of Prayer to be held the upcoming Friday at Youth for Christ offices! It was to pave the way for creating a sustained prayer movement in this area.
The first of those Sunday night prayer meetings was last week (August 8), and we feel this is a prayer movement that should only stop when Jesus returns. We are praying for these meetings to gain momentum and bring unity to the Body of Christ here. One exciting thing to share about the first meeting was that two teenage girls had been walking by and felt drawn to come in…we found out afterwards that they weren’t yet followers of Christ, but they were seeking to know more and learn how they could follow Him! So while Maruping was talking to them afterwards and praying with them, another attendee asked what ministry things I’m doing lately so I told him about starting the abstinence club at the local high school. Turns out, he used to be a Face the Nation volunteer and worked in that school (as well as attended it himself in his teens). He is willing to help with the abstinence club and counseling of teens there!
That same guy stopped by yesterday to tell me that he talked with a teacher at another school where I help lead Scripture Union club, and shared that perhaps YFC can hold a training so the various club leaders at surrounding schools can all come and be equipped on how to lead their own peer-counseling and abstinence clubs. Wow…so that’s cool. Way to think strategically to reach the most youth – train and equip the student leaders from several schools! I honestly don’t know what exactly at this point we would share with them, but he also mentioned that there’s a research agency in town who would be willing to partner with us and possibly provide material and statistics!
The doors of opportunity keep flying open! I need discernment now to be sure I’m choosing the right things to get involved in so I don’t bite off more than I can chew. But that’s a great problem to have…and we just need to pray for God to raise up more volunteers and staff. The fields are ripe for the harvest, but the labourers are few. It is encouraging though to see this guy rising up with such eagerness and willingness to help. He also was one of the lead singers during the whole night of prayer.
Someone sent me a message the other day saying that she was going to pray “that God will send someone alongside you to help you with your work.” I read that yesterday, the day this guy brought up the idea of having trainings for club leaders and expressed his willingness to do whatever he can to help. Then today, Maruping told me that a guy walking past the office told him he wants to get involved—and he too used to be a Face the Nation volunteer! He’s going to stop by and talk to me soon! Amen!!
Tomorrow I am driving 5 hours to a YFC retreat center in Magaliesberg, South Africa with 3 YFC Botswana staff for a youth leader conference this weekend. We will return on Sunday. This will be my first long road trip in Africa, first time driving through a border post, and first time driving in South Africa. Interestingly enough, though, it will be my third time at this retreat center. It was where my mission trip to Botswana in 2004 started and ended! So I’m looking forward to being back there and reminiscing on the many things God taught me there and the journey that He has led me on since. Prayers for safe travels are most appreciated, and also for the Youth Week camp starting Monday for teenagers in a city adjoining the capital. I will give the message on Thursday night about the Holy Spirit and becoming more and more Christlike. Sweetness.
Ok I’m gonna go for a run. I saw a 4 foot lizard recently on a run down by the river! Creepy. Literally ;). Just now I heard rustling outside...a huge herd of goats was in the YFC office yard climbing up and eating leaves off our trees! Like a few days ago, I had to chase the goats out of the yard. Last time the goats were accompanied by 6 chickens too. That was a fun task 'herding' them out of the yard! You're welcome, people of Mochudi, for that spectacle!
Blessings,
Em
Thursday, August 5, 2010
God is faithful, even when life's hard
Hi there,
So it’s been an interesting journey since I last wrote…but I think overall, it has strengthened my faith and determination. I’ll share all this to testify to God’s faithfulness and to perhaps encourage you, as I’ve been encouraged. The same week that I found out about the death of Ken, my dad’s best friend in England, my car wouldn’t start, I got a nasty cold, and a whole load of my laundry was stolen from the clothesline in our yard while I was at ministry (but while other housemates were home)! With all that on top of the backdrop of Dad’s death, it was a bit overwhelming all at once!
The day my clothes were stolen and it was certain that my car battery was dead, I had to buy food to cook the evening meal for everyone. Normally, I would hop in my car, but since it was dead, I walked. As I walked into town, the emotion of everything kind of hit me and I had to fight back tears. I was looking toward the hills in town and started singing this song based on Psalm 121 that I haven’t heard in years—“I lift my eyes up, up to the mountains, where does my help come from? My help comes from You, Maker of heaven, Creator of the earth. Oh how I need You Lord, You are my only prayer, You’re my only hope…”
As I stood in the check-out line in the supermarket, my thoughts went back to everything that was going wrong and I was on the verge of tears. At that moment, I saw a little boy walk by me whose shirt read, “Don’t Quit” and the perfect timing of that just seemed like a little encouragement from God. Minutes later in the other supermarket, again I was on the verge of tears…and then what came to mind was “Indomitable spirit” and how God has really been encouraging me with that perhaps to prepare me for these current trials.
I’ll give a quick recap and share how it has come up here in Botswana too—Just after Dad’s funeral, my aunt read something and the word “indomitable” jumped out at me. I wasn’t totally sure of its meaning, but she confirmed my thought that it means unable to be beaten down or conquered even when lots of bad things come against you. The dictionary puts it, “Incapable of being overcome, subdued, or vanquished; unconquerable.”
I wrote to a friend: “We are indomitable through Christ! No matter what trials, suffering, temptations, evil darts of the enemy...deaths to loved ones, car accidents, health problems, etc...if we are in Christ, even those things cannot defeat us. And if we do die, as Dad did, we go to be with God FOREVER.” A week later as I was sitting in the airport, I happened to look up and read the shirt of a woman walking by—in all caps, it read: INDOMITABLE SPIRIT.
Then the night I arrived back in Botswana a week later, a friend leant me a book about David Livingstone, the famous missionary who pioneered the work in Botswana. I happened to read where it mentioned that after some fellow missionary workers died, and later his beloved wife, he kept going—“His indomitable spirit rose...Livingstone remained steadfast, immovable and resolved to continue his work for the Lord.” In 1873, he wrote, “Nothing earthly will make me give up my work in despair. I encourage myself in the Lord my God, and go forward.”
So back in the grocery store in Mochudi last week, on the verge of tears when one thing after another had been going wrong, I remembered the indomitable spirit. I didn’t feel so indomitable or “more than a conqueror” (Romans 8:37) right then…I felt weak and like I was losing… and when I got home, I did have a good cry. Actually it was one of the most “down” times I’ve felt in my life where I just kept crying (not normal for me, but probably needed as part of the grief process). I was wondering what was going on with one difficult thing after another…and I hate to say it, but I was even wondering how it fits that God is my protector when all this was happening. Why wasn’t He defending me or preventing this?
In the midst of my tears, I realized that one of my housemates had left a chocolate bar with a note of encouragement for me on my desk. Then right around then, through my tears, I heard the song playing on the living room stereo, “Fix You” by Coldplay. I had just shown a video clip with that song as the soundtrack at the YFC Coffee Bar outreach a few days earlier of the 400m race at the 1992 Olympics when Derek Redmond’s hamstring tore 250 m into the race, and yet he was determined to finish, hobbling painfully along the track. Then out of the crowd, a large man pushed his way onto the track and came to Derek’s side to help him finish. This man was his father. Derek was crying and leaning on his father as they finished the race together.
The analogy there is to the heavenly Father who helps us finish the race that is set before us when we are hurting or feel too weak to do it on our own. So when I heard “Fix You” in that moment, I pictured that Olympic race and the father coming to help (like the heavenly Father coming to help me run my race). I fell to my knees in just weak dependence on my strong Father, crying tears overwhelmed by everything but also overwhelmed by His loving care. I need you; I can’t run this race without you…thank you for helping me when I am weak. You can watch the video here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yz05WW8abX0
A bit later, I realized that “indomitable” doesn’t mean that things are not coming against you, but that they can’t affect your spirit or stop you from doing what the Lord has called you to do. It’s an indomitable SPIRIT through Christ. John 16:33 came to mind—“In this world, you will have trials and tribulations, but take heart, for I have overcome the world.” The spirit of the One who overcame is in me to overcome trials today. I remembered one of the things Dad had said to me shortly before I left home, “God will never give you more than you can handle.” I didn’t think of it then, but now I am reminded of this quote I heard the week before I left for Botswana back in February:
"The same everlasting Father who cares for you today, will take care of you tomorrow, and every day. Either He will shield you from suffering, or He will give you unfailing strength to bear it. Be at peace then, and put aside all anxious thought and imaginations." - Francis de Sales
Now in retrospect, I can see that the Enemy was using this time to try to discourage me and get me to question God’s faithfulness and goodness, and whether God was for me or against me in all this. As I was preparing dinner, I just felt like the Lord whispered to my heart, “Em, I’m on your side,” and I replied “I know” as the tears welled up again…Tears for entertaining doubts for even a sliver of time that He wasn’t being faithful by allowing all this to happen…and tears from being assured yet again of His faithfulness and goodness. That night I also listened to a song I just put on my computer in the States but forgot how it went…some of the lyrics were these:
“Though weeping endures for the night, Your joy comes in the morning. Though sorrow may last for a time, Your joy comes in the morning. Faithful, You’re always faithful. True, You’re always true. You’ll never leave me. You’re always with me. You’re good; you’re good.”
Then I happened to read this excerpt from Come Away My Beloved, by Frances J Roberts, which fit perfectly:
You need have no fear. You need not fear the fickleness of providence—for behind whatever looks to you like utter chaos, I have a plan working for your good. You need never fear whether I will be faithful to you, for it I have never failed anyone else, why would I fail you? You have an innumerable company of spectators cheering you from the ramparts of heaven, reminding you of what I did for them, and encouraging you that the struggle is not interminable; surprisingly soon it shall end in victory for you also—if you endure faithfully.
Miracles burst forth out of the moist, cold soil of human tragedy. Moist with tears and cold with hopelessness.
The part about utter chaos reminded me of a poem I wrote in 2003 about how God can bring order out of the chaos:
If the sorrow of suffering and death stings oh so hard yet I embrace the One who conquered it, would I still despair?
If all goes to chaos and yet my Love brought life and order out of such, can I not trust that He can do it again?
That night what came to mind is that I should look up what I wrote in my journal on October 24, and I found this prayer from 10/24/08, when I first re-visited Mission Training International after the accident, which was perfect in its sentiments for my current situation!:
Father,
Oh, Lord, thank you so much for allowing me to come back here. Father, so much has happened since I last typed a prayer to you here. So much. And yet you have not changed. You are still worthy of my love, my all. You are still good. You are still faithful. What has happened in between these prayers has not lessened your love one degree; it has not made your goodness decline. No, you are always good. You are trustworthy. You are the same loving, merciful God who tenderly holds each of your children close to your heart. I don’t know how it all works…still…but I know that you are good. You never leave us. You never forsake us. You are faithful.
I have walked through the valley of the shadow of death, and what did I find? My Shepherd right there with me, holding me. Lord, you never let go. How can I not praise you? I love you. You are beautiful. Words fail me. I just love you. Lord, thank you for never leaving me and never leaving Jess, Karin, and Isaac, or Scott & Andrea either. The King of Love my Shepherd is, whose goodness faileth never; I nothing lack if Thou art mine, and I art Thine forever.
By the end of day that my clothes were stolen, I was greatly encouraged by the God who is with me and for me. I wrote this prayer, more like a triumphant declaration, that night:
You are King. You are Lord. You are my Father. You are for me, not against me. “And if our God is for us, than who could ever stop us? And if our God is with us, that what can stand against? Our God is greater; Our God is stronger, God you are higher than any other…”
You are faithful. You are good. You are greater than the one who is in this world. You are mighty in power. You are glorious. You are loving. You are perfect. You are in control. You are sovereign. You are my Defender. You are victorious. You are indomitable. You have given me an indomitable spirit…because the One who rose from the dead lives in me—the same spirit that rose Jesus Christ from the grave dwells inside me. Indomitable spirit. Yes bad stuff happens in this world—“You will have trials and tribulations, but take heart, for I have overcome the world.” You will renew my strength. You will restore me. You will make me rise above like a soaring eagle. You will make me rise from the ashes. You will work all things together for good. You will be glorified, even in these trials. You will bring beauty from the ashes. Your grace is sufficient. You are enough. You are the God of all comfort. You will never leave me nor forsake me. You will never fail me. You will never forget about me. You will never lose. It may appear sometimes that Satan and darkness have the upper hand, but into the darkness You shine and ultimately You reign victorious and will put all things in subjection under Your feet…Death will be defeated, swallowed up in victory. Satan will be cast down forever. You will make all things right. You will bring perfect justice. You will show Yourself victorious over all—higher and more worthy than any other. None can compare. Conquering Lion with the gentle meekness of the slain Lamb. Lion & the Lamb. Alpha & Omega. Infinite yet intimate. Powerful yet personal. Majestic yet meek. Consuming Fire with consuming Love. Holier than all yet humble servant of all. Strong yet sensitive. Beautiful beyond compare yet broken beyond recognition. Mighty Warrior & my Saviour. My Lord & my God. My Beloved. Furious with injustice, and fighting my Enemy; Furiously jealous for my heart, and fighting all contenders. Relentless in righteousness & relentless in tenderness.
Constant.
My Rock.
My Firm Foundation.
My Hope.
My Redeemer.
Forever.
Amen.
Tonight I echo the words of David Livingstone:
“Nothing earthly will make me give up my work in despair. I encourage myself in the Lord my God, and go forward...”
And the next day I did go forward by His grace…I knew that I had been planning to try the next day to secure the ability to lead an Abstinence Club at the Senior Secondary School here in Mochudi to help in the fight against AIDS and encourage teens toward Christ. Perhaps the enemy thought he could use all these trials to discourage me enough to distract me from that and other ministry here. But no—through connections I’ve made recently to meet the “right” people in the guidance/counseling department (including one who has a Masters degree in HIV/AIDS management and really wants to help), I was able to secure the go-ahead from the school to start a club there next term (after August vacation)! Apparently, YFC has never had a club there, so this was a great encouragement to all the staff! Our God is greater!
That night, I heard this in a teaching: “Every time before the Israelites would go to battle, the priests would stand up and say to the people: ‘Do not fear, do not waver—God your God, fights with you against your enemies.’ God never fights you…I don’t know what’s going on in your life right now, but God never fights you.”
I realized how much God has been helping ease the severity of it all – with both Dad and Ken, we knew they were strong in faith and even thinking eternal thoughts before their deaths. The stolen laundry could have been much worse…true I lost my favorite pair of pants and shorts, but overall, I lost mainly easily replaceable things (towel, white long-sleeved undershirts that I bought here, etc but none of my sweatshirts & only 2 T-shirts). And interestingly, I lost my warm socks that were needed in this Botswana winter, but I still had the wool socks a friend had just given me to bring back from the States. I also lost lots of undergarments (meaning someone, somewhere has my underwear…that is awkward, haha), but again, I had just brought new ones from the States.
And when my car battery died, I was in the capital in a packed parking lot, but right next to my car was a man just sitting in his truck. He had jumper cables, but unfortunately they wouldn’t reach between our batteries. He needed to park in front of my car, but those parking spots were taken (and who knows how long before those shoppers would return to their cars?!). But this man said he would wait with us. Then within 30 seconds, the people returned to the car directly in front of mine and drove away! So the man drove his truck around into that spot and jumped my battery so I could get home safely! Then one of the Canadian short-term volunteers anonymously paid for my new car battery!
The next day, when I was praying about what to share during the YFC staff prayer meeting devotional, Psalm 118 came to my mind. I looked it up to read:
“Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; His love endures forever…The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me? The Lord is on my side as my helper; I shall look in triumph on my enemies.” (vv1, 6-7)
I have much more encouraging things to share about how God has been working here that week and since, but this has been long enough!
Love-in-Christ,
Em
So it’s been an interesting journey since I last wrote…but I think overall, it has strengthened my faith and determination. I’ll share all this to testify to God’s faithfulness and to perhaps encourage you, as I’ve been encouraged. The same week that I found out about the death of Ken, my dad’s best friend in England, my car wouldn’t start, I got a nasty cold, and a whole load of my laundry was stolen from the clothesline in our yard while I was at ministry (but while other housemates were home)! With all that on top of the backdrop of Dad’s death, it was a bit overwhelming all at once!
The day my clothes were stolen and it was certain that my car battery was dead, I had to buy food to cook the evening meal for everyone. Normally, I would hop in my car, but since it was dead, I walked. As I walked into town, the emotion of everything kind of hit me and I had to fight back tears. I was looking toward the hills in town and started singing this song based on Psalm 121 that I haven’t heard in years—“I lift my eyes up, up to the mountains, where does my help come from? My help comes from You, Maker of heaven, Creator of the earth. Oh how I need You Lord, You are my only prayer, You’re my only hope…”
As I stood in the check-out line in the supermarket, my thoughts went back to everything that was going wrong and I was on the verge of tears. At that moment, I saw a little boy walk by me whose shirt read, “Don’t Quit” and the perfect timing of that just seemed like a little encouragement from God. Minutes later in the other supermarket, again I was on the verge of tears…and then what came to mind was “Indomitable spirit” and how God has really been encouraging me with that perhaps to prepare me for these current trials.
I’ll give a quick recap and share how it has come up here in Botswana too—Just after Dad’s funeral, my aunt read something and the word “indomitable” jumped out at me. I wasn’t totally sure of its meaning, but she confirmed my thought that it means unable to be beaten down or conquered even when lots of bad things come against you. The dictionary puts it, “Incapable of being overcome, subdued, or vanquished; unconquerable.”
I wrote to a friend: “We are indomitable through Christ! No matter what trials, suffering, temptations, evil darts of the enemy...deaths to loved ones, car accidents, health problems, etc...if we are in Christ, even those things cannot defeat us. And if we do die, as Dad did, we go to be with God FOREVER.” A week later as I was sitting in the airport, I happened to look up and read the shirt of a woman walking by—in all caps, it read: INDOMITABLE SPIRIT.
Then the night I arrived back in Botswana a week later, a friend leant me a book about David Livingstone, the famous missionary who pioneered the work in Botswana. I happened to read where it mentioned that after some fellow missionary workers died, and later his beloved wife, he kept going—“His indomitable spirit rose...Livingstone remained steadfast, immovable and resolved to continue his work for the Lord.” In 1873, he wrote, “Nothing earthly will make me give up my work in despair. I encourage myself in the Lord my God, and go forward.”
So back in the grocery store in Mochudi last week, on the verge of tears when one thing after another had been going wrong, I remembered the indomitable spirit. I didn’t feel so indomitable or “more than a conqueror” (Romans 8:37) right then…I felt weak and like I was losing… and when I got home, I did have a good cry. Actually it was one of the most “down” times I’ve felt in my life where I just kept crying (not normal for me, but probably needed as part of the grief process). I was wondering what was going on with one difficult thing after another…and I hate to say it, but I was even wondering how it fits that God is my protector when all this was happening. Why wasn’t He defending me or preventing this?
In the midst of my tears, I realized that one of my housemates had left a chocolate bar with a note of encouragement for me on my desk. Then right around then, through my tears, I heard the song playing on the living room stereo, “Fix You” by Coldplay. I had just shown a video clip with that song as the soundtrack at the YFC Coffee Bar outreach a few days earlier of the 400m race at the 1992 Olympics when Derek Redmond’s hamstring tore 250 m into the race, and yet he was determined to finish, hobbling painfully along the track. Then out of the crowd, a large man pushed his way onto the track and came to Derek’s side to help him finish. This man was his father. Derek was crying and leaning on his father as they finished the race together.
The analogy there is to the heavenly Father who helps us finish the race that is set before us when we are hurting or feel too weak to do it on our own. So when I heard “Fix You” in that moment, I pictured that Olympic race and the father coming to help (like the heavenly Father coming to help me run my race). I fell to my knees in just weak dependence on my strong Father, crying tears overwhelmed by everything but also overwhelmed by His loving care. I need you; I can’t run this race without you…thank you for helping me when I am weak. You can watch the video here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yz05WW8abX0
A bit later, I realized that “indomitable” doesn’t mean that things are not coming against you, but that they can’t affect your spirit or stop you from doing what the Lord has called you to do. It’s an indomitable SPIRIT through Christ. John 16:33 came to mind—“In this world, you will have trials and tribulations, but take heart, for I have overcome the world.” The spirit of the One who overcame is in me to overcome trials today. I remembered one of the things Dad had said to me shortly before I left home, “God will never give you more than you can handle.” I didn’t think of it then, but now I am reminded of this quote I heard the week before I left for Botswana back in February:
"The same everlasting Father who cares for you today, will take care of you tomorrow, and every day. Either He will shield you from suffering, or He will give you unfailing strength to bear it. Be at peace then, and put aside all anxious thought and imaginations." - Francis de Sales
Now in retrospect, I can see that the Enemy was using this time to try to discourage me and get me to question God’s faithfulness and goodness, and whether God was for me or against me in all this. As I was preparing dinner, I just felt like the Lord whispered to my heart, “Em, I’m on your side,” and I replied “I know” as the tears welled up again…Tears for entertaining doubts for even a sliver of time that He wasn’t being faithful by allowing all this to happen…and tears from being assured yet again of His faithfulness and goodness. That night I also listened to a song I just put on my computer in the States but forgot how it went…some of the lyrics were these:
“Though weeping endures for the night, Your joy comes in the morning. Though sorrow may last for a time, Your joy comes in the morning. Faithful, You’re always faithful. True, You’re always true. You’ll never leave me. You’re always with me. You’re good; you’re good.”
Then I happened to read this excerpt from Come Away My Beloved, by Frances J Roberts, which fit perfectly:
You need have no fear. You need not fear the fickleness of providence—for behind whatever looks to you like utter chaos, I have a plan working for your good. You need never fear whether I will be faithful to you, for it I have never failed anyone else, why would I fail you? You have an innumerable company of spectators cheering you from the ramparts of heaven, reminding you of what I did for them, and encouraging you that the struggle is not interminable; surprisingly soon it shall end in victory for you also—if you endure faithfully.
Miracles burst forth out of the moist, cold soil of human tragedy. Moist with tears and cold with hopelessness.
The part about utter chaos reminded me of a poem I wrote in 2003 about how God can bring order out of the chaos:
If the sorrow of suffering and death stings oh so hard yet I embrace the One who conquered it, would I still despair?
If all goes to chaos and yet my Love brought life and order out of such, can I not trust that He can do it again?
That night what came to mind is that I should look up what I wrote in my journal on October 24, and I found this prayer from 10/24/08, when I first re-visited Mission Training International after the accident, which was perfect in its sentiments for my current situation!:
Father,
Oh, Lord, thank you so much for allowing me to come back here. Father, so much has happened since I last typed a prayer to you here. So much. And yet you have not changed. You are still worthy of my love, my all. You are still good. You are still faithful. What has happened in between these prayers has not lessened your love one degree; it has not made your goodness decline. No, you are always good. You are trustworthy. You are the same loving, merciful God who tenderly holds each of your children close to your heart. I don’t know how it all works…still…but I know that you are good. You never leave us. You never forsake us. You are faithful.
I have walked through the valley of the shadow of death, and what did I find? My Shepherd right there with me, holding me. Lord, you never let go. How can I not praise you? I love you. You are beautiful. Words fail me. I just love you. Lord, thank you for never leaving me and never leaving Jess, Karin, and Isaac, or Scott & Andrea either. The King of Love my Shepherd is, whose goodness faileth never; I nothing lack if Thou art mine, and I art Thine forever.
By the end of day that my clothes were stolen, I was greatly encouraged by the God who is with me and for me. I wrote this prayer, more like a triumphant declaration, that night:
You are King. You are Lord. You are my Father. You are for me, not against me. “And if our God is for us, than who could ever stop us? And if our God is with us, that what can stand against? Our God is greater; Our God is stronger, God you are higher than any other…”
You are faithful. You are good. You are greater than the one who is in this world. You are mighty in power. You are glorious. You are loving. You are perfect. You are in control. You are sovereign. You are my Defender. You are victorious. You are indomitable. You have given me an indomitable spirit…because the One who rose from the dead lives in me—the same spirit that rose Jesus Christ from the grave dwells inside me. Indomitable spirit. Yes bad stuff happens in this world—“You will have trials and tribulations, but take heart, for I have overcome the world.” You will renew my strength. You will restore me. You will make me rise above like a soaring eagle. You will make me rise from the ashes. You will work all things together for good. You will be glorified, even in these trials. You will bring beauty from the ashes. Your grace is sufficient. You are enough. You are the God of all comfort. You will never leave me nor forsake me. You will never fail me. You will never forget about me. You will never lose. It may appear sometimes that Satan and darkness have the upper hand, but into the darkness You shine and ultimately You reign victorious and will put all things in subjection under Your feet…Death will be defeated, swallowed up in victory. Satan will be cast down forever. You will make all things right. You will bring perfect justice. You will show Yourself victorious over all—higher and more worthy than any other. None can compare. Conquering Lion with the gentle meekness of the slain Lamb. Lion & the Lamb. Alpha & Omega. Infinite yet intimate. Powerful yet personal. Majestic yet meek. Consuming Fire with consuming Love. Holier than all yet humble servant of all. Strong yet sensitive. Beautiful beyond compare yet broken beyond recognition. Mighty Warrior & my Saviour. My Lord & my God. My Beloved. Furious with injustice, and fighting my Enemy; Furiously jealous for my heart, and fighting all contenders. Relentless in righteousness & relentless in tenderness.
Constant.
My Rock.
My Firm Foundation.
My Hope.
My Redeemer.
Forever.
Amen.
Tonight I echo the words of David Livingstone:
“Nothing earthly will make me give up my work in despair. I encourage myself in the Lord my God, and go forward...”
And the next day I did go forward by His grace…I knew that I had been planning to try the next day to secure the ability to lead an Abstinence Club at the Senior Secondary School here in Mochudi to help in the fight against AIDS and encourage teens toward Christ. Perhaps the enemy thought he could use all these trials to discourage me enough to distract me from that and other ministry here. But no—through connections I’ve made recently to meet the “right” people in the guidance/counseling department (including one who has a Masters degree in HIV/AIDS management and really wants to help), I was able to secure the go-ahead from the school to start a club there next term (after August vacation)! Apparently, YFC has never had a club there, so this was a great encouragement to all the staff! Our God is greater!
That night, I heard this in a teaching: “Every time before the Israelites would go to battle, the priests would stand up and say to the people: ‘Do not fear, do not waver—God your God, fights with you against your enemies.’ God never fights you…I don’t know what’s going on in your life right now, but God never fights you.”
I realized how much God has been helping ease the severity of it all – with both Dad and Ken, we knew they were strong in faith and even thinking eternal thoughts before their deaths. The stolen laundry could have been much worse…true I lost my favorite pair of pants and shorts, but overall, I lost mainly easily replaceable things (towel, white long-sleeved undershirts that I bought here, etc but none of my sweatshirts & only 2 T-shirts). And interestingly, I lost my warm socks that were needed in this Botswana winter, but I still had the wool socks a friend had just given me to bring back from the States. I also lost lots of undergarments (meaning someone, somewhere has my underwear…that is awkward, haha), but again, I had just brought new ones from the States.
And when my car battery died, I was in the capital in a packed parking lot, but right next to my car was a man just sitting in his truck. He had jumper cables, but unfortunately they wouldn’t reach between our batteries. He needed to park in front of my car, but those parking spots were taken (and who knows how long before those shoppers would return to their cars?!). But this man said he would wait with us. Then within 30 seconds, the people returned to the car directly in front of mine and drove away! So the man drove his truck around into that spot and jumped my battery so I could get home safely! Then one of the Canadian short-term volunteers anonymously paid for my new car battery!
The next day, when I was praying about what to share during the YFC staff prayer meeting devotional, Psalm 118 came to my mind. I looked it up to read:
“Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; His love endures forever…The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me? The Lord is on my side as my helper; I shall look in triumph on my enemies.” (vv1, 6-7)
I have much more encouraging things to share about how God has been working here that week and since, but this has been long enough!
Love-in-Christ,
Em
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)